Surrounded

There are times in life when we feel surrounded. When negative feelings are swirling around you. The bills seem to be magically appearing while the money in the bank account depletes exponentially faster. The kids can't ever seem to be happy. You can't clean fast enough, cook fast enough, no matter how hard you try. Everywhere you turn you feel fenced in.
You know there is blue sky and the sun is shining, but you just can't seem to find it. You are just... surrounded.

You have family and you know that they love you. But sometimes, well maybe a lot of times, it is easy to take that for granted. I know my family would do anything and everything for me. With all this change in the midst of my life right now I have continued to be amazed by our family. Teri and Darrol (Marcus' parents) had a BBQ get together where everyone could get together to say good bye to my husband. They reserved a building at Berthusen and we hung out all afternoon and ate until we couldn't eat no more.

I was blown away. Blown away with all the family that came, from both sides (Radder's and Erickson's). They decked out everything in true army fashion and the feeling was so celebratory.

There have been some negative feelings about this road that we are embarking on, which is totally understandable, it is a HUGE decision. I was mentally prepared for that when we decided to take this course of action. What I was not prepared for was the outpouring of support.

The phone calls checking in to see how we are doing, the invitations to come to dinner, the heartfelt notes. The offering of free babysitting so we could go on a date, clean our house or just be alone together. The helping hands that whipped our yard into tip top shape and detail cleaning of our house in readiness for any potential viewers to drop by.

The gentle hugs with soft spoken words of support, voices telling me they are only a phone call away. The emails from those near and far offering support and help. The big giant bear hugs that feel like they are going to squeeze the life out of me. The smiles... when words just don't seem enough, but in those smiles I am warmed to the core. I have never felt so much love and support. I have never felt so enveloped by the selfless sacrifice of so many. How can anyone deserve this? I am surrounded, and I have never felt more safe. You will never know how you are touching our lives.

When blended families congregate there are copious amounts of pictures. After a while everyone starts to get a little slap happy.

Marcus said they were calendar men... Mr. April and Mr. March.

While Grandpa Richard was taking this photograph he told Marcus and Darrol to think of Megan Fox. To which Marcus replied "Who is Megan Fox?".... to which I then said "Good Answer".

Bianca charmed everyone and just about ate her weight in blueberries. It made for pretty interesting diapers changes this morning. Her little bum is stained blue.

I have been starting to get a little more emotional about it all. We are down to the last week of Daddy in the house. I know everything is going to be okay, that the girls and I will be okay, but I still have my little sad moments. They tend to hit me when I least expect it, but I will not let myself wallow. Even with a temporary separation upon us I really feel like this is a happy and exciting time in our lives. After debating for a while about a career change it is so exhilarating to know the path that you are supposed to be on. To have a plan mapped out.

I allow myself to feel to sadness when it creeps in, but when that moment is over I pick myself up, hug and kiss my family and try to come up with a fun adventure we can go on together. Whether it be to the park, Edaleen dairy, reading some books or playing tag. We are going to live it up this week, enjoy every moment, so we can hold on to it. Then when I do feel sad again I can look back here and read about it all. Remind myself of all the people who love me and who are there for me.

How truly blessed we are to have the friends and family that we do. You are impacting our lives in ways that you can never imagine and we will be forever grateful.